Do Not Let Your Innerlight Snuffed Out

To the frustrated,

You may have difficulty waking up in the morning and wondered what lies ahead. Everything seems bleak and no one in the world seems to care. I know, I have been through it and I am going through it. There are thoughts of regrets, remorse, revenge, self pity and even suicide. You know what? Those feelings are normal.

Take a deep breath and start breathing. Pay attention to your breathing. Fill your lung with air and let it out gently by emptying your lung. You are still alive. Take stock of what you have, write down five things that you are grateful for. Think and thank the people who has helped you in the past.

Are you drinking? Cut those out now. You do not need any form of alcohol. Alcohol affects your thinking and your sleep. You need to think clearly and sleep well. What is over is over. You cannot change the past, you cannot predict the future. Now is the most important time. Think about what is the outcome that you want to achieve. Do not wish. If you wish for something, you are expecting someone else to do the heavy lifting for you. At this point in your life, you have to take charge and figure out what to do. Set a goal, look at the goal and write down your options and action items.

Write down your options. Finished? Write down some more.  Finished? Write down even more. Go through the list. Some are down right bad ideas, cross those off. Filter through the ideas and short list the best ones. Is it done? No, not really.

Find a mentor, find someone whom you can trust and give you an honest feedback. Talk to this person, discuss the issues and talk about your ideas. Do not expect the person to give you any action items. No. You have to take ownership of your action items. At best the mentor can only tell you what is their opinion and assign a timeline for your action items.

During this period, make sure you eat well, sleep well, stay active and spending enough time with your love ones. No TV, no idle surfing the net and no gossip. Clinch every moment you have and work on your goal. Review your action items and talk to your mention as you progress.

Will things get better? Of course not! You will encounter more frustrations and set backs as you move towards your goal. Failure is because you have tried. Frustration is because you are doing something different. Keep going and keep moving.

What if you do not have the sufficient knowledge or resource to make things happen? Read and reach out into the internet. Chances are your problems is nothing new, someone must have encountered it. Read and learn as much as possible. People can bring you down and take away your possessions. However, they cannot take away what you know. To be competitive, you just need to know a little bit more than your competitor.

The hard truth about life, all these will come to an end. Nothing stays forever. Sorrow and setback will come to an end, so is happiness too. Hang on there and stay strong.

Kind regards,
Simon.

You Just Need to Show Up and Ask

There are sayings that to succeed you just need to show up. While another saying, ask and you shall receive. In my experience, not only you need to show up but to ask as well. When I say ask, it means asking tactfully.

Lately we have been working on a couple of prospects. The discussion to secure a deal is still on going, but the very least we are given the opportunity to be heard. I do not know these prospects personally nor we were introduced. It just so happens that we got acquainted through a charity event and exchange name cards. These prospects are all well established players in the market while I am still a new kid on the block with limited clientele and cash.

Instead of hard selling my services, I asked about their business, plans and frustrations. I offered some of my thoughts and even promised to introduce somebody that I might know whom might be able to help them. After we have established the relationship, did I immediately sell my services? No. I did not. I offered to catch up over a cup of coffee to discuss the matter further and wanting to know more about they do.

This sets up the opportunity for a second meeting. I would use that time to check out and understand more about this prospects. It can be their business nature or read up about things that they enjoy. If the person is a football fan, I would read up about it. Some of you readers may think this not sincere at all. You are wrong, I am sincere. I genuinely wanted to establish a relationship with this person. The only way is to have a common ground. Not all prospects can become business opportunity, the bright side is that you make a new friend.

In our second meeting, we would have more things to discuss and talk over. Will I spring up the question about my business offerings? The answer is depends. If I notice that there is nothing that we can offer. I will keep my mouth shut about my services. Occasionally I would say something about my company but never in detail unless the person ask. If there is an opportunity, I would offer my company's service but it is never in detail. If the person is keen, I would ask for a formal discussion. Of course, this sets up another meeting which is a formal meeting. Even if there is no opportunity, it is no harm to catch up again.

That's why showing up to meet the person is not only important but knowing how to ask tactfully is vital too. Many would think that "to ask" is means to ask for the business. It is not true, to ask is to understand your prospects and offer a solution to their problems. Is this time consuming? Yes, it is time consuming but we are here to establish a long term relationship. In many business dealings, it is all started from human interactions and relationship.